17 September 2009

Burning Questions - Eastern Conference

So, it seems like the done thing is for your average NHL writer/columnist to do some sort of "Burning Questions for the 30 NHL Teams" feature (example HERE).

These things rarely ask the questions that I would be asking, were I to be to sitting at home posing rhetorical NHL questions to myself. So, here goes for the Eastern Conference (the West will follow if I feel like it):

Atlanta Thrashers
When will somebody notice that Don Waddell still has a job?

Boston Bruins
Will the Bruins miss Zdeno Chara while he recovers from injuries sustained when hitting his head on the scoreboard during an off-season tour of the Dallas Cowboys' new stadium?

Buffalo Sabres
Is this the year Tim Connolly reaches the landmark of 20 career NHL games?

Carolina Hurricanes
Will Jim Rutherford ever move on?

Florida Panthers
Will somebody actually paying to attend a Panthers game be the first sign of a turnaround in the global economy?

Montreal Canadiens
Will the annual team bonding trip to Disney World be ruined when half the players are not allowed to go on the rides?

New Jersey Devils
Will Newark's infrastructure cope with the impending stampede of hockey fans desperate to catch a glimpse of the second coming of Lemaire's Devils?

New York Islanders
Is Marty Biron the backup goalie or the backup GM?

New York Rangers
What will snap first: Avery's leash, Gaborik's groin or Tortorella's patience?

Ottawa Senators
Have they cleared enough cap space to take Wade Redden back yet?

Philadelphia Flyers
As both a cheap, stop-gap goalie and a violent nut-job, is Ray Emery the ultimate Flyer?

Pittsburgh Penguins
Has Sid still living in Mario's house yet crossed the line that separates "slightly creepy" from "moderately disturbing"?

Tampa Bay Lightning
Can the signing of 23 new defensemen possibly come close to replacing the mammoth contribution of Marek Malik?

Toronto Maple Leafs
Will Brian Burke and Ron Wilson ever manage to overcome their chronic shyness in front of the media?

Washington Capitals
What will be greater in number: Alex Ovechkin goals or Semyon Varlamov name changes?

1 comment:

  1. hahaha I was eagerly awaiting this, and I'm definitely not disappointed! I think my favorite one is the Habs. Maybe Gionta can hop up on Hal Gill's shoulders to sneak onto Space Mountain. Or Quasimodo--I mean, Markov-- could maybe call in some personal favors.