19 September 2009

Burning Questions - Western Conference

Following from my recent Eastern Conference run-down (HERE), yet more smouldering queries, this time (shockingly) covering the Western Conference:

Anaheim Ducks
Which writer will first produce an article featuring the Ducks and Bob Murray without using the phrase "retooling on the fly"?

Calgary Flames
Will controversy ensue if/when Darryl Sutter's wife beats out Curtis McElhinney for the backup goalie position?

Chicago Blackhawks
If the Hawks reach the Stanley Cup Final, are they allowed to trade Marian Hossa to their opponents before it starts?

Colorado Avalanche
How many months will pass until Greg Sherman and Joe Sacco can get into Pepsi Center without having to convince the security staff that they really do work there?

Columbus Blue Jackets
Is it some strange Canadian thing that makes all announcers say Monsieur Vermette's first name as "Ann-twon" rather than "Onn-twan"?

Dallas Stars
How long until Sean Avery isn't the sole reason for every game the team loses?

Detroit Red Wings
Has Ken Holland already scouted the foetuses that will be the future team-mates of Zetterberg and Franzén when they hit the final year of their new deals?

Edmonton Oilers
Will the Renney/Quinn good cop/bad cop routine eventually lead their players to break down and confess that none of them want to play in Edmonton either?

Los Angeles Kings
Can Quick and Brown lead the Kings out of their dire era?

Minnesota Wild
Will Don Cherry realise before either retires than Owen Nolan isn't called "Olin Nolan"?

Nashville Predators
Is Alexander Radulov determined to stay in Ufa until he becomes an UFA?

Phoenix Coyotes
Can Jim Balsillie fill the chasm felt by so many Canadian fans by bringing a third non-playoff team to Ontario?

San Jose Sharks
Did Doug Wilson put an appropriate degree of fear into his players by suggesting that Dany Heatley would "give the whole team a lift"?

St. Louis Blues
With a T.J., a B.J. and a D.J. on the depth chart, is a trade for Umberger in the works, or will the Blues entice Axelsson or Stock back to the NHL?

Vancouver Canucks
Will an irreparable hole be torn in the space-time continuum if the Sedins ever have career scoring totals more than two points apart at any time?

1 comment:

  1. hahahahahah those are brilliant! Particularly like the Sharks and Coyotes ones. I can just imagine the destruction Heatley could cause with the Pacific Coast Highway in his backyard.