Burning Questions - Western Conference

Following from my recent Eastern Conference run-down (HERE), yet more smouldering queries, this time (shockingly) covering the Western Conference:

Anaheim Ducks

Which writer will first produce an article featuring the Ducks and Bob Murray without using the phrase "retooling on the fly"?

Calgary Flames

Will controversy ensue if/when Darryl Sutter's wife beats out Curtis McElhinney for the backup goalie position?

Chicago Blackhawks

If the Hawks reach the Stanley Cup Final, are they allowed to trade Marian Hossa to their opponents before it starts?

Colorado Avalanche

How many months will pass until Greg Sherman and Joe Sacco can get into Pepsi Center without having to convince the security staff that they really do work there?

Columbus Blue Jackets

Is it some strange Canadian thing that makes all announcers say Monsieur Vermette's first name as "Ann-twon" rather than "Onn-twan"?

Dallas Stars

How long until Sean Avery isn't the sole reason for every game the team loses?

Detroit Red Wings

Has Ken Holland already scouted the foetuses that will be the future team-mates of Zetterberg and Franzén when they hit the final year of their new deals?

Edmonton Oilers

Will the Renney/Quinn good cop/bad cop routine eventually lead their players to break down and confess that none of them want to play in Edmonton either?

Los Angeles Kings

Can Quick and Brown lead the Kings out of their dire era?

Minnesota Wild

Will Don Cherry realise before either retires than Owen Nolan isn't called "Olin Nolan"?

Nashville Predators

Is Alexander Radulov determined to stay in Ufa until he becomes an UFA?

Phoenix Coyotes

Can Jim Balsillie fill the chasm felt by so many Canadian fans by bringing a third non-playoff team to Ontario?

San Jose Sharks

Did Doug Wilson put an appropriate degree of fear into his players by suggesting that Dany Heatley would "give the whole team a lift"?

St. Louis Blues

With a T.J., a B.J. and a D.J. on the depth chart, is a trade for Umberger in the works, or will the Blues entice Axelsson or Stock back to the NHL?

Vancouver Canucks

Will an irreparable hole be torn in the space-time continuum if the Sedins ever have career scoring totals more than two points apart at any time?

Burning Questions - Eastern Conference

So, it seems like the done thing is for your average NHL writer/columnist to do some sort of "Burning Questions for the 30 NHL Teams" feature (example HERE).

These things rarely ask the questions that I would be asking, were I to be to sitting at home posing rhetorical NHL questions to myself. So, here goes for the Eastern Conference (the West will follow if I feel like it):

Atlanta Thrashers

When will somebody notice that Don Waddell still has a job?

Boston Bruins

Will the Bruins miss Zdeno Chara while he recovers from injuries sustained when hitting his head on the scoreboard during an off-season tour of the Dallas Cowboys' new stadium?

Buffalo Sabres

Is this the year Tim Connolly reaches the landmark of 20 career NHL games?

Carolina Hurricanes

Will Jim Rutherford ever move on?

Florida Panthers

Will somebody actually paying to attend a Panthers game be the first sign of a turnaround in the global economy?

Montreal Canadiens

Will the annual team bonding trip to Disney World be ruined when half the players are not allowed to go on the rides?

New Jersey Devils

Will Newark's infrastructure cope with the impending stampede of hockey fans desperate to catch a glimpse of the second coming of Lemaire's Devils?

New York Islanders

Is Marty Biron the backup goalie or the backup GM?

New York Rangers

What will snap first: Avery's leash, Gaborik's groin or Tortorella's patience?

Ottawa Senators

Have they cleared enough cap space to take Wade Redden back yet?

Philadelphia Flyers

As both a cheap, stop-gap goalie and a violent nut-job, is Ray Emery the ultimate Flyer?

Pittsburgh Penguins

Has Sid still living in Mario's house yet crossed the line that separates "slightly creepy" from "moderately disturbing"?

Tampa Bay Lightning

Can the signing of 23 new defensemen possibly come close to replacing the mammoth contribution of Marek Malik?

Toronto Maple Leafs

Will Brian Burke and Ron Wilson ever manage to overcome their chronic shyness in front of the media?

Washington Capitals

What will be greater in number: Alex Ovechkin goals or Semyon Varlamov name changes?